F*ck them…just love Jesus.

Have you ever been told who you are is not good enough?

Have you ever been made to feel like your decisions in life, whether past or present make you less than someone else?

Have you ever felt like no one could understand or love you?

Have you ever felt shamed or guilted at the hand of someone else?

Do you question whether or not your life will ever amount to anything substantial?

Have you ever been you hurt? Broken? tired? desperate? alone? dirty?

If you answered yes to any of the above questions. Congrats You are human. You are living the human condition. You are just like the rest of us. Welcome to the world.

For 95% of my life thus far I have lived in a bubble. It was a very pretty, very clean bubble. Full of pretty and clean people “just like me”.
We all believed the same, prayed the same, worshipped the same God. Loved the same types of people. Married the same types of men and women. Had the same types of children. Judged the same sins. We all agreed to cast out the same types of people. “Habitual Sinners”. People who “actively chose to live a life of sin”.

And for years. I was ok with that. I am ashamed to say.That was acceptable to me, and I am sorry for that.

It has taken my own personal journey through my sexual orientation and gender identity to realize how grossly off base all of that was. Some people can get it without ever dealing with their own personal sexuality or gender, and I commend you allies for that. I was never able to do that. But I digress.

This is not about my personal journey.

This is a call…
A call to anyone who is different…
Anyone who is a misfit…
A castaway…
An outcast….

to say first…You are not alone…

You are not alone in your belief that there is NOTHING outside of the love of Christ.
In your belief that JESUS DIED FOR EVERYONE. Anybody who loves him, and follows his heart, is “saved” (used for lack of a better term).
In your belief that it doesn’t matter if your Gay, Straight, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Questioning, Pansexual, Poly, 2 Spirited, or any of the other million and one ways we as a “Queer” community feel comfortable identifying ourselves. Jesus still loves you, because you are part of “the world” that God loved so much he sent his son to die for.
In your belief that there is something fundamentally wrong in telling someone they are LESS than because they are different.
In your belief that “Love the sinner, hate the sin” is a load of bullshit excuses that needs to be done away with forever. I mean its not even in the bible!
In your belief that you can love Jesus and love someone of your same gender, or change your gender, or drink whiskey, or smoke cigarettes, or have tattoos, or cuss, or all of the above. (thats me, at all of the above haha.)

And to say Second: If you believe in one or more of these statements my Selfish hearts desire is to tell you “Fuck the church, just love Jesus.” but I won’t. Because the truth is, They need love too. Perhaps more than we do. “We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love each other. Anyone who does not love remains in death.” 1 John 3:14

Instead I will tell you…

Love Jesus…

Love those who hate you…

and He will love you…

Oh! and I will too…

And Lastly I will say: NO matter who you are, or where you are. If I’ve met you, if I haven’t or if I never will…I love you. Deeply and truly. You are accepted here. I would love to hear Anyone and EVERYONE’S thoughts or comments. No matter if you agree or not. Please feel free to comment below.

Choose love.

One of the greatest lies ever to be spread throughout the world (especially western culture) is that Love is an emotion. It is something that just “happens”. You “fall in love” with someone, and then when the good “feeling” is gone, and it becomes work you “fall out of love” with that person. Like you cannot help it. Our culture seems to believe that Love is a happy flowing emotion, that sweeps you off your feet, that over takes all good sense and takes you for a wild ride. That you can get lost in it, and that you can find happiness in it. It is somehow an all encompassing emotion that is the end all, beat all, answer to everything. And yet it is not something you can control.

Well I call bullshit.

Love is an action…

Love is a choice…(no not like you can choose not to love someone of the same sex…thats attraction…and totally different…and a different subject for another time.)

take this definition found in 1 Corinthians 13 (with some of my personal explanation thrown in there too)

Love is Patience: Love is when the person you love does that one thing that drives you most insane; that one thing you’ve asked them not to do a hundred times before but they still forget and do it anyway…you have patience and gently remind them how annoying that thing is, and how much it makes you want to punch them in the face (kidding of course…I’m not in any way promoting domestic violence just fyi) 

Love is Kind: Love is spending time with the person that no one wants to be associated with. Its listening to that person that you don’t even want to speak to anymore, and giving them a chance to explain. 

Love does not Envy and it does not boast: Love is not being jealous of your partner getting the nice relaxing bubble bath while you wash the dishes, and it is also doing the dishes to help your partner be able to relax, not because you might get some afterwards. In other words Love is giving without expectation. 

Love is not Proud: Love is admitting when you’ve wronged someone, it is humility.

Love does not dishonor others, and it is not self seeking: Love is defending someone who is being bullied, teased or picked on. It is giving someone else the spot light in your life, and it is lifting up another persons needs above your own. 

Love is not easily angered and it keeps no record of wrongs: Love is counting to ten (or in my case 50) before you speak, and it is forgive and truly forget. It is letting go of anger, and letting go of hurts (after you’ve communicated with your partner in an appropriate way)

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth: For me personally this means, Love is not making my ex’s life miserable because I did that for a while, and I’ll admit it was just to hurt her and that is just mean. Instead I should be rejoicing in the fact that she is happy in her life. 

Love always Protects: Love is speaking for those who don’t have a voice, and listening to those who don’t have anyone else to turn to. 

Love always Trusts: Love is second chances (in healthy environments). Love is believing that it is possible for people to change and grow.

Love always Hopes: Love is the hope that tomorrow I will love deeper, harder, and fuller. Love is the hope that comes from Christ, that I am made new each day because He loved me, and so I will love others. 

Love always Preservers: (this is my favorite) Love is never giving up on someone. Just as Christ is always loving me no matter how far or how often I run away, and just as my mother will never stop loving me no matter how many times I cause her to almost lose her mind. I will never stop loving the people in my life, and you know who you are; I will never give up on you. 

Love is definitely more than an emotion. All of the things mentioned above are actions, daily choices that must be made. I believe at the core, Love is selflessness. A moment by moment choice to set aside my needs in favor of putting another persons needs first. 

and that my friends, is the complete opposite of my nature.

I am working on choosing love more often, I still fail…often. But when I succeed it is always fulfilling. When you give love freely it always comes back though not always from the same source, but it will come back to you.

So be patient, be kind, let go of your envy, Be humble, Forgive always, champion the truth, protect the little guys, always have hope, and keep on believing…

Because Love never Fails.